Training begins to take its toll
By Laura Collins
Published in State News on January 25, 2010 1:46 PM
Jan. 25: Day 8
Today's Menu: Breakfast: Oatmeal. Bacon. Fruit. Milk. Juice; Lunch: The biggest burger Hardees offers plus fries and a drink; Dinner: Cook at least a pound and a half of hamburger at home for dinner. Do not completely drain grease. Be sure to include bread, rice, cabbage, brussel sprouts, pasta, etc.; During the day: Chew gum for six consecutive hours. Drink 6 20-ounce bottles of water.
When I decided to take on The Andy's Big "A" Challenge I thought it'd be fun. I thought it'd be great to mindlessly eat whatever I wanted without feeling any regret.
Wrong. I think I may be the first person to have mad cow disease. Over the course of the past week I ate nearly 10 pounds of ground beef, in addition to carbs, fruit, vegetables and insane amounts of water. I'm eating so much that I am full 24-hours a day. The constant state of uncomfortable is making it hard for me to sleep through the night. The lack of sleep has made me increasingly irritable, and my filter telling me what is and what is not OK to say seems to be defunct.
That being said, I'm still wholeheartedly comitted to this. Anyone who wants to send any tips, tricks of the trade or words or support can e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Here's a sampling of comments from the ever-supportive team at the News-Argus:
"It might be more economical for you to just buy a market cow instead of all that hamburger." -- Ken Fine, reporter
"You know, there's a plus size store across the street." -- Mr. Tanner, publisher
"Are we going to be able to expense a crane to carry Laura around?" -- Ken Fine, again
"You're better than TV." -- Steve Herring, reporter